Sunday, December 20, 2015

December 20 - Dear Nicholas Sparks

Dear Mr. Sparks,

Have you seen all the photos in the news about grieving parents incorporating their children's memories into photos? I've become obsessed with them. I think they are beautiful.

I recently moved and I've been looking at photos of Shane that i haven't looked at in years. It's been emotionally draining. Tonight I just felt pulled to do this photo. I have 10000 other things to do before Christmas but I couldn't shake this so I gave in and did it.

I don't have a little family (no husband or other kids - going through a divorce) so what I do have for a family and where my son's memory is remembered the most is at CHERUBS. This is our office hallway. The tree is decorated with my personal ornaments, including Shane's. This is where his spirit lives on for me. This photo is a way to include him in my current life and raise awareness. It is symbolic. It's not the best graphic quality... I have never done this before.

I have a very dear friend helping with a project similar to this (his will be much better than mine! He's an amazing photographer) and I've spent months talking to him about a way to do this for all our grieving parents. We are working on ideas. 

Christmas is a wonderful time of year for me, even though I lost my son.  I still believe in Santa and my faith is strong and I know I will see my son again because of His son. 

If you're not familiar with  Shane's story, you can go to Shane's site at

I'm behind on posting letters but they are coming.  We will finish this year.  Between the divorce, moving more, a death in the family and all the charity work... I don't have time to myself lately to do anything, including write letters.  I write them out in my head, I have notes everywhere... they will make it here before the end of the year.   I am not a quitter.
From my family and from the charity to your family... Merry Christmas.
Dawn M. Torrence
Emotionally drained grieving CDH mom

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